I need to know God.
Now, does this mean I don't know God? Well, we would all like to say that we know God right? But, without me getting into the theologically, politically (in)correct way of explaining, I'll just stay on course with my personal plight to share...
I believe I know God--of course! I know that I received Jesus Christ as my personal Savior at the very tender age of eleven, been baptized, received the Holy Spirit, been ordained into ministry, and so on....
However, just recently, I was privileged to sit under the teaching of my Pastor and the Lord ministered through Him the story of Jesus' resurrection in a new light that I've never heard before. And I was convicted to my very core. Basically, those that knew Jesus, walked with him, talked with him,witnessed numerous miracles take place by his hand and sat under his teaching, but didn't recognize him after he was resurrected-- and when he was revealed to them and disappeared, they talked among themselves about themselves and how they felt while he was in their presence. Seemingly, there was no thought of repentance from not recognizing the Savior nor any thought of how Jesus may have felt that after all that had taken place from before the crucifixion to the resurrection, that they would at least be looking for him in some way.
Just read the story (scripture reference at the bottom).....
What did I get out of it? I asked myself this question: Why do I do what I do? That's what I got out of this message. In understanding that we are made for companionship, relationship, etc., it's easy for some to become lost in balancing seeking the appreciation of God verses the appreciation of man. I'm stepping back for a minute to check my scale. Have I been with Christ all this time, experienced his presence, heard his voice, witnessed his miracles, heard his teachings, but still find myself not looking for the power of HIS resurrection in my life when I need it most? Is Jesus walking and talking with me, but I'm more concerned about what my friends, family, neighbor, etc. has to say about the matters of my heart or the situations I face? And when God steps into my "breath and wind" space, do I testify from a stand point of arrogance to esteem myself higher or do I testify from a place of humility declaring, "only by His grace, I stand"? When these areas are in question, one must step back and look again and allow the Holy Spirit to reveal the truth of the matter--what's really in our heart.
My prayer is that from this experience, I would come away with a greater confidence and contentment in who God has made me to be and that my disposition, demeanor, and stance would not be deterred my mere man. I don't just want to talk about Christ, I want to talk to Christ and recognize him when he's walking along with me.
Thank you for reading, sharing and your support! If the Lord wills it, there will be another blog.... I'd just will that my Father be the first subscriber. :)
I want to be ready for His return--Keep looking up! I love you all!
~Tyvee B
Matthew 19:26; Luke 24; 1Corinthians 2:3-5
